In Which Our Author Hates Matt Gyure

The Internet, have you ever met Matt Gyure? You should avoid that because he is objectively the worst person and a strong contender for worst living being. In the race for "Most Terrible Life Form," he was neck-and-neck with MRSA until MRSA started mentoring a troubled inner-city youth last month.

See, this hour's topic was supposed to be "Walk 100 paces and find a thing to blog about," and like a dutiful participant in 24-hour blog day, I did exactly that. I took Matt's camera/phone and walked 100 paces, at which point I found this house whose windows were glowing green. I thought that would make a really cool blog so I took a picture, but I was kinda nervous because I was taking a picture of someone's windows, so the shot came out kinda blurry. So I deleted it and took another picture, this time at peace with my suspicious behavior. I checked it on the camera/phone to make sure that it looked good and hightailed it back to the house before the neighborhood watch came after me. But when Matt went to upload the picture to the Internet, he said it wasn't there.

I am convinced he did that because he was jealous because my picture was better than his. He didn't want to face the truth that my blog about the hi-jinks of a family of wizards or Christmas elves would have won blog day. Anyway, wish him luck in his contest for Most Terrible Life Form. The prize is a monogrammed wool sweater soggy with dog spit.